


the golden rules

by smutpeddler



Category: Misfits (TV 2009)
Genre: Angst, F/M, Fluff, POV First Person, Swearing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-11
Updated: 2019-03-11
Packaged: 2019-11-15 08:52:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,240
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18070280
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/smutpeddler/pseuds/smutpeddler
Summary: Request- Hey b!🖤😍 Can you do #11+12 from the sappy prompt list with Nathan? Where they’re best friends but the reader thinks he’s into Kelly so distances her self a bit. Thanks, ily babe!!





	the golden rules

**Author's Note:**

> I got this request over at my tumblr (stargazingwithcassidy.tumblr.com) and decided to cross post it over here.

I had 3 rules when it came to Nathan Young; never take him seriously, never let him see me cry, and  _absolutely_ , under no circumstances was I to fall in love with him. I should’ve predicted I’d break all those rules being the massive fuck up that I am. Admitting I was undeniably in love with him didn’t seem like it would have any real consequence. He was dead, except he wasn’t because of course the twat wouldn’t be dead. And since his return, I hadn’t seemed to be the only experiencing the warm and fuzzies for him. This had lead to breaking my first rule. Watching the two of them go back and forth, back and forth. Well, how else was I supposed to take all  _that_? It’s not like they knew, well Kelly might but that seemed unlikely given the present circumstances, but I couldn’t help it. Stupid, cliché, bullshit reaction is how I ended up taking it. Just started to pull away. I hurt in an indescribable way, deep down inside and I sure as hell didn’t need anyone else to feel it. Especially him, who made it so strong that I ached to unleash it on some bastard just to feel empty for a moment.

One rule, I had one rule left unbroken _. Never_ let Nathan see me cry. I held onto it, tight, hoping I’d get away with it and our friendship still intact. I’ve never been particularly lucky, the universe seemed to decide this would be the absolute perfect time to remind me of that fact. Just because it felt like a knife was permanently jammed in my got, I would be expected with a fresh batch of groceries from the shop. He’d only eat pilfered, vending machine junk food if I didn’t bring some semblance of healthy food, really he would just know something was wrong if I didn’t show. I didn’t need those big, green,  _stupid_ eyes staring at me and asking about my well-being. Not after all this Simon nonsense, not after weeks of this Kelly shite. He’d end up being just the poor bastard I’d find myself hoping for recently. He didn’t deserve that, at least I thought he didn’t deserve that.  _But he knew._ He knew I was coming with groceries. And it wasn’t as bad as it could be, it still twisted the knife until I was almost sure I must actually be bleeding.

Nathan had his hand down Kelly’s knickers, they might’ve been far apart but is hand was most definitely down er knickers. I dropped the groceries, listening to beer cans spurt open as if the sound might somehow make me process what I was seeing quicker. They jumped apart looking at me like they hadn’t been doing anything like what I’d seen. But they had, they  _fucking_ had! I thought it would feel good when it happened. Letting all the never ending hurt, unyielding jealous, and just sheer loneliness hit them full force and rewarding myself with the feeling of blissful emptiness. It felt just the opposite, once the fog lifted it felt just the same as before. Except now Nathan knew, which seemed to make it feel infinity fucking worse. I didn’t even have a chance to put up a fight, the tears started down my cheeks and my legs carried me at top speed out the community center doors. Only once I’d reached the bench did I skid to a halt, panting, trying to focus on my breathing instead of how I felt. I had to stop crying, belt up, and  _move the fuck on._ He wanted Kelly, not me, Kelly. I’d find a way to cope, I was good at coping. But that just couldn’t be the end of it, could it?

The universe fucking me over again and again is how I ended up right here, breaking the last rule that kept my friendship with Nathan an  _actual_ friendship. He’s staring at me, looking so fucking concerned and I know I’m a mess. No doubt my face an unflattering shade of red and my eyes raw from crying. He doesn’t ask me what’s wrong, he knows the answer. I just need him to go away, this second, I just need him to leave me alone. Let me try to pretend like none of this is happening right now.

“That wasn’t what it looked like,” wasn’t what it looked like? Utter twat, “Okay! It was but it wasn’t. We’re mates,  _just mates._ ”

I scoff, “What? So since she won’t shag you, you think just because I’m all weepy-”

“Oh don’t even pretend like you believe that load of utter shite, I know you don’t think I’m that big a wanker,” face twisted in the mock offense, a comical thing that only he had mastered. I snicker, barely a sound, the lightest twitch at the corner of my lips, “Any other girl would’ve walked away right then. Or..or…slapped me me for the thousand other bits of creatively crafted, crude comments that I can not for the life of me figure out how to filter between my brain and my mouth,” I sigh, shaking my head. I can’t follow where he’s trying to go, everything’s too fresh, “ _You said that._  It was the nicest thing you ever said to me before you all buried me alive. And now!”

“I really don’t understand where you’re going with this, Nathan. I really just need you to go,” I can feel another batch of tears ready to burst any second now, being the center of world wasn’t helping, “Please just go, Nathan.”

“You could’ve just told me, we’re best mates, this is the kinda bullshit we’re supposed to talk about. It would’ve been much quicker and involved a lot less…mucus,” and there it is, the smile I can’t help. No matter how I try, no matter what I feel or do, he will  _always_ make me smile, “Why didn’t you tell me, love?”

I wipe my nose the sleeve of my hoodie and shrug. He takes a few steps closer to me, shrugs aren’t answers to Nathan, “I thought you didn’t want me. That’s it. It was never like it was with her.”

“I thought you would’ve slapped me!” taking another step towards me as he gripped my biceps, making sure to lean forward so we’re eye to eye, noses almost touching, “I thought to myself, if I snog this amazing, perfect, bitch she will rip my cock right off,” his smile so big and bright, saying exactly the kind of stupid and yet sweet shit that I know he says when he’s trying to be genuinely sincere, “Jesus! I’m saying I want you.  _Only you!_ ” shaking me lightly.

It feels almost normal, nodding my head, pressing my hands to his cheeks, “Yeah, I’m getting that,” he pouts, as if he thinks I don’t, not really and he is absolutely prepared to keep talking if I let him, “You’re a twat, you know that?” pressing the tips of our noses together, “And a dick. An absolute bastard that I should never ever talk to again.”

“You’re about to snog me, aren’t you?” pout swiped for that cocky grin I had fallen in love with, even though it was probably the worst idea in the world, “You’ll have to beat me to it.”

“ _Utter twat._

To his credit, I did not beat him to it.


End file.
